I don't have time to write everything I want to say about the horrifying event that happened yesterday. America has made a terrible choice by electing a man that not only has no experience, is not qualified to lead the most powerful country in the world, but someone who is a socialist and that in itself is a very scary thing because I know what it's like to live under the mandate of people with those beliefs. I can't believe the stupidity of people who have put a man who will bow down to terrorists because he's affiliated with terrorists himself.

People have let the liberal media brainwash them as well as doing what Hollywood and Oprah told them to do because they think that those idiots are qualified and they know absolutely nothing! Liberals talk about the economy and this and that and how come they had fundraisers where a dinner plate cost $20,000? Why not give that money to foundations that helped people that are going through hard times, people that can't heat up their homes this winter etc?

They just don't see it, they voted against President Bush even if he wasn't running and the media has crucified him and made him look like it's all his fault when in reality it's the liberals blocking every attempt he made at trying to do right for this country. You can disagree all you want because you think that what the media tells you is true. I assure you, they don't know the concept of journalism. I studied it for a while and I saw with my own eyes their reporting of what was "going on" in Panama but it was completely different than what was really happening there. They twist everything!

Get a copy of the Constitution because Obama is going to change it. I'm so sick to my stomach. This is a scary time for America and they can't even see it! Ignorance is bliss indeed!

My ex-husband who is an Army Veteran called me really late last night and he was disgusted too and he told me that for the first time in his life, he was scared for this country. He understands what people like Obama do when they assume power...he saw what happened in other countries. I am scared for this nation as well...America has blamed the wrong person. It was Clinton who had the chance to take out Bin Laden and he didn't because he knew that by doing so, America would have to go to war and he knew that it would be unpopular so he chose not to do anything and let the next president deal with it and as a result thousands of people died on 9/11. But America said they would never forget and they already did! They just can't see the bigger picture and the truth!

My cut and color came out great last night and Andrea looked fabulous!I have to get ready to get going in a while.

***6:49 p.m. Well, I refuse to watch TV, I don't want to see the media gloating about the elections and I'm so disgusted by all this. And no, I don't like Obama, I get such horrible vibes about the man and I'm 99% dead on that assessment when it comes to people. And I will scream if anyone tries to play the race card with me because it's not about that, if Condi Rice were to run or Colin Powel for the Republican ticket, I'd be so up for that. It's a matter of who is right for the job because I have seen first hand what it's like for people with visions like his get to power and abuse it and take away people's rights. Enough of politics, I'm so sick of it, it's not even funny!

Things went great for me today and I think I finally found the right place for me where I can grow more as a stylist with a great supportive staff that is committed to team work and help each other succeed which is something that's really hard to find sometimes in this cut-throat business I'm in. So I'm excited to have become a member of the culture that this salon strives on and I'm proud to be a part of a gorgeous, high-end salon and spa where I can do what I do best...help people feel good about themselves and look like a million bucks! I needed a salon where they will work with me to achieve my goals and further my education as a stylist because this is an ever-changing industry and I like to keep up with that, so this is very important to me. I pray to God that things do work out here because this feels really right for me and I need good things to happen to me after all the hell I've been going through and put through.

Phil visited me last night. It had been a while and it was good to have a visitor even though we were bummed about what was going on with the elections.

I can't wait for Alex to come visit me from PA next week! I talked to Andrea a while back, she loves her color that I did last night and I think it brings out her eyes even more...she has pretty eyes and I'm excited that my new boss raved about my work on that demo.

I had a lot on my mind today though, on my drive back home after my first day at orientation at the spa. I was thinking about Emily and how I loved being in the kitchen cooking and her being around anxious to eat "yummy foods" like she called my meals. I miss her so much. I loved cooking for her and for Bob too...it was my small labor of love but in my mind, one of my favorite times and places to be at home...making meals for my loved ones, feeling like a family, talking to him about our day and talking to Emily. That's part of how I pictured our lives would be, I truly loved the role of doing that for them, taking care of them that way. Some people see cooking as a chore and some don't even like it, to me it was always a labor of love and a special time to bond. I had so much more to give besides what I had already given to them...he knows that no one else will devote her life and love to him and to Emily like I did...and he knows he told me so himself. This is truly a travesty. I meant everything I said to him and I wanted to devote my life to them, to a life together like he wanted to...always with loyalty, faithfulness and love...and he threw it all away. Shame on him for not remembering that I am who I was with him even though right now I'm someone who has been hurt savagely, who has had her dreams shattered and her hopes destroyed...someone who grieves every day for the baby I didn't get to hold in my arms.

Congratulations girl!I'm so proud of you!I know you wanted to make this move and you wanted to be in an environment where you can thrive and where you fit perfectly!This is so you for sure!You classy latin mamma!Good for you!You needed something this good to happen to you.I'm really excited for you. I know it's hard for you when you think of that little girl because you love her so much, it's so unfair for sure!I totally see what you mean, it's so in your character to be so loving and nurturing that you see things the way you do. I simply see it as ugh cooking!You find beauty and your love shines through even the smallest things or things most people take for granted. What a huge loss for Bob, Derek and I agree on this.You are "THE CATCH" and he's so stupid to let all that shit get in the way and if he really cheated on you, he's an even bigger idiot!You never stop amazing me, you have such a big heart you make me cry sometimes and you know how tough I am!